My heartbeat’s connected
To the ellipses on my screen
Pumping, pacing, pending,
Then vanishing.
So I just look away
And try to drown it all out with loud sounds.
Now I’m listening to sad songs
Wondering if I’ll soon feel that way.
But the truth is that I’m not sad.
I’m just angry.
Bursting at the seams, ready to implode,
I’m losing my sense of purpose
And I don’t even really know
Why I care, why it matters.
But it’s been a week,
And I’m still waiting for a response.
I can’t get the bitter taste of it
Out of my mouth, I’m out of my mind
But I’m getting tired.
And I want to stop mourning
Those chances that aren’t yet gone,
But I already miss it,
And I’ve already said my goodbyes,
And all I really want to do is just
Curl up under four layers of down blankets
And close my heavy eyes.
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