Walking through the hallways of IHS, there are many dangers that faculty and students have to face on a daily basis. The school has become a monster house with lead-contaminated water, asbestos-filled walls, floors falling out from under desks all putting students in constant peril. These circumstances have left the students lurking in the many hallways of IHS asking: Why is IHS trying to kill us?
First with the lead crisis, slowly poisoning all drinkers of the school’s infamously delicious water. With 10 plus years of damage on those exposed, we must wonder what kind of mutations have been put onto the victims. Or even, what is in the “water” coolers that the school has proved as a “safe method of hydration.” Are they using bottled water in the kitchen, or is the soup filled with lead? What’s more, who knows what the water in the swimming pool contains. It is unknown when the pool was last drained, and one P.E. teacher has even commented that if the water was to be drained, the walls of the pool may cave in. This has caused many dangers for the school’s swim teams and for P.E. classes that have ventured into the black water to learn the proper technique for elementary backstroke. Members of the swim team often complain about Fred, a ghost who resides in the gutter of the pool feeding off gum, bandaids, and the laughter of teengers. Along with the pool’s toxic levels of chlorine, the lead in the pool has most likely been accumulating for years. One accidental swallow during the front crawl may result in a death at the hands of IHS or years of disease and woe in the ending decades of swimmer’s lives.
At every turn, it seems as if IHS is poisoning us in some way, from asbestos to whack floors. With recent “flooding” causing many classroom floors to breakup and close said rooms, the cause is really unknown, forcing students to relocate. Although it seems plausible that the water running underneath tiles could cause them to become warped and cracked, the theory of undead beings rising from underneath the school was never proven wrong, nor was the possibility of an Ithacan version of the Chamber of Secrets being opened and a 75 foot basilisk slithering through the pipes of the high school. This, however, would mean that the basilisk itself would be poisoned by lead, hindering its fluid movement with joint pain and constipation causing it great difficulty in terrorizing the students. The administration has not responded to a request for comment. This extra stress is unwarranted and leaves students constantly questioning when the floors may be about collapse from underneath them.The school claims that the asbestos problem is being handled, but it’s unknown whether the harmful spray is leaking out of these classrooms during school hours, filling the lungs of passerby with toxins potentially even more dangerous than the asbestos itself.
With many lives at risk, people have begun to seek a savior. There have been rumors throughout the school of an oracle being located in the second floor of K-building, telling students how much longer they have left before these terrors destroy them. The chances of this supernatural being bringing any help to the people in need is becoming slim to none as the school year is closing, but with a little hope, students and faculty are expected to make it out alive.