The One with Life Advice from Friends
Aries (Mar. 21–Apr. 19):
You’ve been BAMBOOZLED!
—Joey
Taurus (Apr. 20–May 20):
Welcome to the real world. It sucks. You’re gonna love it!
—Monica
Gemini (May 21–June 20):
Isn’t that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
—Rachel
(Best of luck to you, Gemini.)
Cancer (June 21–July 22):
All right, look; if you absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing’s right. And that’s what deathbeds are for.
—Chandler
Leo (July 23–Aug. 22):
Should I use my invisibility to fight crime, or for evil?
—Chandler
Unfortunately, Leo, you will face a moral question much like Chandler’s this month.
Virgo (Aug. 23–Sept. 22):
I’m not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
—Chandler
Libra (Sept. 23–Oct. 22):
Ross himself believes you have found unagi. Congratulations!
Scorpio (Oct. 23–Nov. 21):
It’s a moo point. It’s like a cow’s opinion; it doesn’t matter. It’s moo.
—Joey
Sagittarius (Nov. 22–Dec. 21):
I’m not sure what to say here, but I was told to mention, “Gal Pal Rachel Green.”
Capricorn (Dec. 22 –Jan. 19):
Your head, my friend, is not just a hat rack.
Aquarius (Jan. 20–Feb. 18):
Express yourself.
Pisces (Feb. 19–March 20):
THEY WERE ON A BREAK