Do you want to hear a statistic?
I swear it won’t ruin your morning. Well, no promises. Across the world, an estimated 1.35 million people die from car accidents every year. To put that into perspective, that’s roughly ten packed sports arenas. Imagine an entire stadium, filled to the brim, with the caskets of people … times ten.
That’s kind of depressing … right? Ok, now you’re definitely mad I ruined your morning.
I’m sure you’ve read the title of this article, and by now, you’ve probably figured out the subject of this article: the good old grim reaper. And specifically, how are we supposed to deal with it?
Well here’s the crappy thing about dying: you can’t really communicate with anyone if you’re … well, dead. That’s as far as we know, anyway. This also means you can’t talk to someone if they’re dead, which also sucks. It can be soul-crushing when a relationship ends prematurely, especially when one party never got the closure they desperately crave. This is why I’m so confused when people don’t try harder to express their affection for others, before they pass away.
In my opinion, ninety-five percent of what we say at funerals should’ve been said years earlier, in-person. At least that’s what I’d like … I’ll take my compliments now please, instead of when I’m lying in some lame-ass casket. Because what am I supposed to do then?
Look, at any moment I could take an unexpected trip to Madison Square Garden, and no, not to see Taylor Swift. That goes for everyone I know. So with the threat of death suddenly looming over our heads, I want to take this opportunity to say something I never have:
To every friend, acquaintance, parent, or kind stranger, to anyone who has read my pretentious Tattler submissions, or listened to my music, and to all the people who’s held the door for me, threw me a birthday party, or smiled:
Thanks.
And if we’ve got any more time left together, then here’s to a better future.