Cancer (June 21 – Jul 22):
Your professor will ask you to accompany them as a co-researcher on a trip to the Galápagos, where you will spend months chillin’ with tortoises.
Leo (Jul 23 – Aug 22):
You’ll be asked by school admin to be that kid who wears the mascot costume.
Virgo (Aug 23 – Sep 22):
Your roommate will turn out to be the heir to a small kingdom, and they’ll invite you to spend Winter and Spring Break at their mansion in the middle of nowhere on some other continent.
Libra (Sep 23 – Oct 22): Upon reflection, you’ll realize that you’ve always wanted to move to one of those islands off Ireland that pay you to live there. You’ve officially dropped out of college by November and will spend the rest of your life on the beautiful island of Inis Mór.
Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21): The coolest thing about it will definitely be the lack of heat in your dorm come winter.
Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20):
You’ll join Adventure Club and enjoy every weekend hiking, camping, and white water rafting.
Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21):
You will spend so much time in the library that the shelves will suck you in, leaving you to haunt future freshmen attempting to study for finals. Being a haunted spirit is pretty cool.
Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19): You and your roommate will accidentally adopt a pet rat found in your dorm shower, forming a bond that will last years. The rat’s name is Harry.
Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18): After working at the local Panera for two weeks, your boss will give you an unbelievably massive raise and you’ll graduate debt-free, with millions in the bank and stocks.
Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19):
A friend’s friend’s mom who works for Vogue will manage to get you a ticket to the Met Gala. Gucci will reach out and ask you to model, and you’ll accept the offer.
Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20):
While your year won’t be boring, it certainly won’t be incredible. You’ll have some close friends, keep up the good grades, and be content with the quality of the food in the dining hall. It’s okay that nothing super cool will happen this coming year. You’ve got more to come.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20): Your advisor will find you a last-minute opportunity to study abroad during your second semester. You’ll finish the year having lived in a cute dorm complex for a few months in rural France. How charming!