Once upon a time there was a little dude named Jennifer. He was a great guy, but he was bullied in school because all the other kids were meanies, and they told him “you can’t be named Jennifer, you’re a boy.” But Jennifer was strong, and he held onto his lifelong dream—to live in a green house with green furniture and green walls—and he made it out and graduated high school.
But then when he went off to college he realized he had some unresolved trauma from being bullied so he decided to join a support group for guys named Jennifer with three other Jennifers. This wasn’t an official school club or anything; it was just held in the dorm room of two of the participants who were roommates, and they were both named Jennifer. Roommate Jennifers had tried to date briefly, but eventually the one living on the side of the room by the window decided that he wasn’t actually bisexual—he was just sad—so they’d decided to stay friends and not compromise their great roommate dynamic.
And so every week the four Jennifers in the support group would sit together on the floor in the dorm room and talk about life and love and all that stuff, and one time our original main character (Jennifer) decided to be really vulnerable and told the other Jennifers about his lifelong dream of living in a green house. And the other Jennifer, who didn’t live in this dorm room, was like “Wait, that’s crazy, I’ve always wanted to live in an orange house,” and it turns out the Jennifer who lived on the window side of the room wanted a blue house and the Jennifer on the door side wanted a purple house.
And so the four of them knew what they would do. So they all studied hard and graduated college and went off into the workforce. Green Jennifer started working in finance (because money is green) and Orange Jennifer had a barista job at like four different coffee shops and Blue Jennifer became a semi-successful actor and Purple Jennifer inherited a bunch of money when his grandma died.
So they all had a decent bit of money, and they decided to buy a huge four story house from a lady named Rothilda and her husband, Benedict. And they painted one side of it green and another side orange and another side blue and another side purple and they made each floor a different color and they all moved in together. And Blue Jennifer realized that he actually was bisexual after all, he was just also sad, so the four of them started living as a polycule and they all lived happily ever after.
The end.
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