Plenty of corporations over the years have tried playing April Fools’ “jokes” on the public in recent years, and whether ill-advised or not, they continue…
The Tattler
Scientific Abstracts
The following is a small collection of recent scientific research and discoveries. Applications of cell phagocytosis A recent study done by Harvard University concluded…
That Sounds Like a You Problem: Conquering Senioritis (If You Feel Like It)
Q: Hi Abby. So it’s my last semester of high school, and I’m pretty sure that I’m starting to develop senioritis. I’m so ready…
Excerpts from the Tattlers of Yesteryear
December 1911 W.W.H. (in public speaking): “That won’t do, Mr. Howell, you must leave the platform on tiptoe.” Sid: “What’s that for?” W.W.H.: “Otherwise you…
Trevor Noah at Ithaca College: Analyzing Politics and Society Through a Comedic Lens
On April 8, comedian Trevor Noah, host of The Daily Show since 2015, performed at the Ithaca College Athletics and Events Center. The venue, unfortunately,…
Reggae Favorites of an Aspiring Reggae Artist
Finna bump during that special time of the day between 4:19 and 4:21? Well, some reggae vibes are sure to get you in the mood,…
Nearly 13 Reasons to Watch 13 Reasons Why
On March 30, Netflix released an original show called 13 Reasons Why based on the best-selling book of the same title by Jay Asher. The…
Why You Should Watch Samurai Jack: Season 5
Gotta get back, back to the past. Eleven years after its fourth season ended on an ambiguous note, this March kicked off the final season…
Seniors Pursue Artistic Dreams through WISE
Writing a cookbook, producing an album, or learning to tightrope walk might not seem like the things you’d do in an English class, but the…
Let Them Down Easy: A Playlist
Of all the methods of breaking up with someone, texting is cowardly, talking is hard, and emailing is unheard of. How about sending a song?…
The Decemberists at The State
The Decemberists are an indie-rock band hailing from Portland, Oregon. Founded in 2000, with the release of their initial EP 5 Songs in 2001, it…
Celebrating Coffee
On April 7, Ithaca College hosted a festival to celebrate the achievements of some alumni in film studies, as well as the subject of their…
Identity
Is it the classes I take Is it the yards that I rake Is it my town by the lake Is it my dinner of…
A Family Undone and Unknown
An angel A ghost A flame A wolf A cat And a tree As hard as I try I can’t change this My family It…
A Loss of Light Haiku
Can’t find any light A loss of order on Earth People start to fight
Commonalities of the Ones I Have Loved
wounded souls are drawn to their kin. jagged edges crash together, slicing each other apart in vain hopes that through this, they can be…
Memoria
I saw her stand there on the shore And watch the current flowing by On and on, forever more Beyond the sight of mortal eyes…
Paperland
The wind goes in one direction All at once It moves against me As I walk ahead It pushes me backwards Taking me to a…
Why Russell Westbrook Deserves the MVP Award
As basketball season nears its end, the debate has inevitably begun over who should win the most coveted awards, especially the Most Valuable Player (MVP)…
Why AP Students Should Play Sports
Many AP students do not have time for sports. With homework for hours on end and excess extracurriculars to put on their college applications, playing…
Tristan’s Angst: Student Council to Take Revolutionary Action to Improve IHS, Situation Unresolved
Following years of grandiose statements about being part of student democracy and allowing for leadership, the IHS Student Council voted to “become more important.” According…
The Coolness Spectrum
COOL Symmetry New Tattler Editors Science March AP classes after AP tests Cinco de Mayo Cardboard that tastes like school pizza PROM!!! (Senior, Junior) Sunburns School…
How to Fix the Knicks 2.0
Note: Tanking is the process of losing games intentionally to achieve higher draft picks. For the last few years, the New York Knicks have…
Horoscopes: Pick-Up Lines at a Baseball Game
Aries (Mar. 21–Apr. 19): I’ve been striking out all night but I think I’m about to make some solid connection with you; hey the name’s…
IHS Teacher Proves Riemann Hypothesis
In a sudden revelation, a serendipitous brainchild of fate, a disciplinary intersection of theory and application, what will henceforth be known as “the tossup that…
Instead of simply using the IHS Tattler to guard his partes privadas from the greasy chain of a moto, whatever that is, area English teacher…
Local Boy Qualifies for USAMO
On April 1, it was revealed that Casey Wetherbee ’17 had qualified for the United States of America Mathematical Olympiad (USAMO) to be held on…







