How Do You Sleep During the School Year? Perhaps This Horoscope Will Know!
By ETHAN CARLSON
Libra (Sep 23 – Oct 22):
Around eight hours because you are a normal person who does normal things.
Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21):
Eight hours EXACTLY: You’re the type of person who does this because you’ve heard your parents say it to you way too many times.
Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21):
You say you sleep for eight hours, but you only sleep six.
Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19):
Nine hours: You’re the type of person who thinks the extra hour of sleep will improve your test score the next day, but it won’t.
Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18):
Five hours: Only on a bad day (which is every day).
Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20):
Ten hours: How do you do it? Because I would really like to know.
Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19):
Four hours: You’re the type of person who brings a thermos of coffee to school.
Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20):
Six hours: You’re the type of person who could get eight hours of sleep if only you didn’t keep LOOKING AT YOUR PHONE WHILE IN BED.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20):
Three hours: Delete TikTok. It’s for your own good.
Cancer (June 21 – Jul 22):
Seven hours: You’re the type of person who frequently forgets that one homework assignment.
Leo (Jul 23 – Aug 22):
Eleven hours: You are inexperienced with sleeping pills and you constantly wake up late for school.
Virgo (Aug 23 – Sep 22):
You NEVER sleep: You’re not anyone because you’re probably dead.